How to Disappear Completely

How to Disappear Completely

On Modern Anorexia

  • Ebook
  • ISBN 9781468308464
  • 272 Pages
  • Overlook Books
  • Adult


At fourteen, Kelsey Osgood became fascinated by the stories of women who starved themselves. She devoured their memoirs and magazine articles, committing the most salacious details to memory to learn what it would take to be the very best anorexic. When she was hospitalized at fifteen, she found herself in an existential wormhole: how can one suffer from something one has actively sought out? With attuned storytelling and unflinching introspection, Kelsey Osgood unpacks the modern myths of anorexia as she chronicles her own rehabilitation. How to Disappear Completely is a brave, candid and emotionally wrenching memoir that explores the physical, internal, and social ramifications of eating disorders.


“All addictions are alike, but not anorexia. The looking glass malady covertly twists even the language of healing to its own ends. In this brilliant book, Kelsey Osgood breaks this demon’s code.” –Susannah Lessard, former New Yorker staff writer and author of The Architect of Desire: Beauty and Danger in the Stanford White Family

“The clear-eyed rigor of How to Disappear Completely is a refreshing corrective to hazy clichés of genius and madness and romance and rebellion that cloud discussions of art and mental illness both.”
New York Magazine
“An incredibly realistic portrayal of anorexia. [Osgood is] a precise, smart, and beautiful writer.”
“Osgood’s candor and humor carry the narrative; the reader nods and laughs even while shuddering. She demarcates myths about anorexia while illuminating truths about what it’s like to be hospitalized and in treatment…this is a book for every Millennial.”—
“[Osgood] showcases a world that debunks so many of the commonly held but misguided beliefs surrounding the disorder, and also how the same forces that are meant to support anorexics are often the ones that amplify its effects.”—Bookslut
 “How To Disappear Completely changes the conversation when it comes to eating disorders…Osgood paints an illuminating and incredibly honest picture of the struggle so many young women face, and it’s eye-opening.”—Refinery 29
“A provocative new take on anorexia and how we approach the illness socially.”—Huffington Post
“Osgood vividly portrays the creepy phenomenon of the “pro-ana” movement and the claustrophobic, self-involved, achingly lonely world in which young women compete to be “perfect” anorexics.…the novel is imbued with pathos and tenderness.”Publishers Weekly
How To Disappear Completely is a wholly original and thought-provoking meditation—part-memoir, part sustained essay—on the coded culture of anorexia, what it purports to mean, and what it really signifies. I didn’t think I wanted to read another word about eating disorders, but Kelsey Osgood made me reassess the way I consider this illness, its genesis, and the suffering that underlies it.”
—Daphne Merkin, author of Enchantment and Dreaming of Hitler
“Kelsey Osgood has written a consequential book about an important subject: the ways in which the stories anorectics tell themselves and others about the disease can be as dangerous to them as their own behavior . . . Carefully considered and delivered in finely wrought prose, it’s a book that should find a large audience.”
—Caitlin Flanagan, author of Girl Land and To Hell with All That
“Clear-eyed, compassionate, and courageous, How To Disappear Completely deepened my understanding of anorexia and those who suffer from it. Kelsey Osgood is a terrific writer.”
—Rosie Schaap, author of Drinking With Men
“All addictions are alike, but not anorexia. The looking glass malady covertly twists even the language of healing to its own ends. In this brilliant book, Kelsey Osgood breaks this demon’s code. “
––Suzannah Lessard, former New Yorker staff writer and author of The Architect of Desire: Beauty and Danger in the Stanford White Family
“In How To Disappear Completely, Kelsey Osgood achieves a paradox: she writes beautifully about anorexia, without beautifying or poeticizing an affliction that is anything but. Instead, her gripping story and smart analysis lay anorexia bare for what it is—greedy, cunning, and wasteful, its logic tedious, its damage too often permanent. This is important reading for parents of teenagers, and friends and loved ones of anorectics, and an education for anyone who’s felt the troubling allure of the waif archetype.”
—Katherine Sharpe, author of Coming of Age on Zoloft
“Why do countless young women (and not so young women, and some men, too) starve themselves to the brink of death? Do not read Kelsey Osgood’s uncompromising memoir of her own anorexia unless you really want to know the truth—unvarnished by moral, therapeutic, or redemptive pieties—about this epidemic. How to Disappear Completely gives new meaning to gutsiness.”
—Judith Thurman, Staff Writer at The New Yorker, and prize-winning author of Isak Dinesen: The Life of a Storyteller and Secrets of the Flesh: A Life of Colette
“What sets Kelsey Osgood’s memoir apart from the existing literature on anorexia is the author’s commitment to stripping the glamour and romance from the illness. Yes, Osgood suffered from anorexia, but she refuses here to play the game of ‘eating-disorders porn’, focusing instead on how we must learn better ways to discuss anorexia in order to ‘undermine its currency’, to save ourselves and our loved ones from the nightmare that it is. Intelligent, moving, beautifully written, Osgood has written a paean to wellness, and taken a forthright look at everything that anorexia, ‘bastard child of vanity and self-loathing’, took from her life.”—Molly McCloskey, author of Circles Around the Sun